Dear Mr. President February 11, 2010

Dear Mr. President,

I must apologize I did not write yesterday as I promised. Sometimes there are not enough hours in a day. I am sure you can understand.

As you know it is tax season...( horror music playing in the background). Since, I have been paying taxes (2 years) I have tried to maintain a positive attitude about it all.I mean even Jesus says " give to God's what is God's and Cesar what is Cesar's". I trust the government has their hearts in the right place and that my money goes to better the United States and all peoples.

Today is my day off, well at least from my primary job. So, I took the morning to do my taxes. By the way, you can tell the IRS "you are so welcome" and give them my condolences for all the grief they get. Anyway... I was ready to face the day! I had my all my papers and forms ready to go. I was sure I would not have to wait long because it was mid-week, mid-morning, and snowing; and in Abilene, it usually means business is slow. I put on my snow boots, grabbed my purse, told myself to be confident, and bounced out the door. Unfortunately, I also bounced down my stairs. Literally, I bounced. It was about the third step where I slipped on the mushy snow and down I went. It was really quite hilarious. Just imagine a brown hair, blue eyed, bundled up, Teletubby, in snow-boots, bouncing down about 10 steps on her bottom. FUNNY... I told you and don't feel guilty about laughing. After I regained control from my fall and outburst of laughter, I stood up, brushed the snow off, and headed to the nearest HR Block. I figured the worst of the day was behind me. Once I arrived I was properly greeted and like I had hoped- there was no one else in the office. I was seated for just a few minutes then taken to a nice little cubical where I would almost meet my doom.

It may be somewhat taboo to just post my annual income for 2009 but I think it will help shed some light in the darkness. My estimated income for 2009 was 10,000. Which is right below the poverty line cut off of $10,843. Awesome. But hey, I made it and that in itself is a blessing. As the kind lady was going through my forms she just shook her head and looked at me. Not a good sign. She proceeded to tell me I was not having enough money withheld from my check. What?. I told myself to remain calm. I told her that I choose single and 0 on my taxes. Her response was " I know dear" but at least 10% of your check should be withheld each pay period. Okay, I can take one for the team but really? I don't even get 10% of my income for my personal use- I couldn't even pay the full amount of my electric bill this month on my own. I was okay after a moment and we continued. Next, I cooked a meal for a Non-Profit organization here in town. They paid for all my expenses. They paid me $600.00. Yes, you better believe the IRS wanted some of that too. Little did they know I used $300.00 dollars of that to give people that helped me and I couldn't prove it because I am not a business and I paid them cash. Okay, I'm not even going to go into the rest. However, at the end of my tax experience I felt like the IRS was yellin' "Whose your Daddy now".

I know my tax experience may not have been what I had been expecting it to be but the truth is I don't have a lot of reason to complain. At least I get a refund and that money will go a long way. But there are those who need a break and it's hard to find them. A friend of mine made slightly more than she did last year. Last year, she was right at the poverty level, and this year she just tipped over the line. She now owes the government almost $200.00. How is that helping her? How is that bettering her life? I don't understand? I don't understand a lot of thing about taxes. So, here are my questions for you.

1. Why are filing taxes so complicated that most people have to pay someone to file for them. Is there anyway we could make the processes less complicated or at least get some better instructions-please?

2. Why does the IRS need 10% of my paycheck withheld when I am making poverty level wages with two jobs? I understand I choose how much I "withhold" but I am going to take the advice of a professional because I don't even understand "withholding and a defiantly don't want to owe the IRS. So, what am I withholding for? Why at least 10%? How are people in poverty or people slightly above poverty get ahead when things like this happen?

3. Where is my money going? I want to see a budget(s) and I would like to have it explained and I don't mean in C-SPAN terms I am talkin' wikipedia term/ urban dictionary terms. And, what is the governments reasoning behind the budget(s)?

4. Is there a tax credit/cut for social worker, educators, and related fields? If not, there should be, considering the pay scale and stress level (http://money.cnn.com/galleries/2009/pf/0910/gallery.stressful_jobs/index.html) ? Not to say we should encourage people to go into those fields because of a tax break but it would be not only a kind gesture but a well deserved one.

Alright Mr. Obama enough with the interrogation. I hope I was not offensive. I appreciate you and compliments to the First Lady, whom I personally adore, for speaking up about childhood obesity. Blessings.

Sincerely,

Mary Gauldin

Dear Mr. President February 9, 2010

Dear Mr. President,

You may wonder why I am writing to you. It may seem odd to post a letter to you on my blog but I wanted this letter not only to reach you but others who may or may not share similar concerns and or thoughts. My main concern is "can you hear me, can you hear us?" " Who, if anyone is listening?". I want to be clear this is in no way to slander, hurt, or compromise you, Mr. Obama, as a person, a man, and or President. Nor is it grounds for myself or persons who read/comment on this blog to be disrespectful, rude, arrogant, proud, or in anyway hurtful. I defiantly do not give the right or authorize the use of these letters or their content in anyway to anyone including but not limited to any type of media. My words are not weapons- let that be clear. I am only here to tell a story. A story in which I feel may be like many others in some form or fashion.

So here's the deal. I have a plan. I hope to write you a letter consistently for 30 days. I will post these letters to my blog. In these letters I will tell you about my day. Basically the who, what when, and where of my day. I will address concerns that revolve around issues I and others I know face on a day to day basis.I will usually ask you questions- most of which will not be rhetorical. Sir, if possible I would appreciate an answer- even a I don't know would suffice. I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammatical errors I promise to do the best I can with the time I have.

Okay, now that we've got that down let's get to know each other. My name is Mary Elizabeth Gauldin. I was born in Waynesboro, VA but am now a proud resident of Abilene,TX. I came to Abilene to attend Abilene Christian University due to finances I could not finish my college education there. I took a break from school for two years, also because of finances, but am now attending Cisco College here in town as a part time student. I work full time at Harmony Family Services as Youth Care Worker and work part time as the office manager at Sharky's Burrito. If you want to learn more about my job at Harmony, please read my post called Ninety Days. I volunteer at Connecting Caring Communities and have been involved with them since 2006. My hobbies include photography, painting, drawing, writing, planning projects, cooking/baking, reading, walking, singing, playing the piano, wii boxing, watching the Dallas Cowboys, basketball, and traveling. Things I am trying to learn are Spanish, French, how to "speak softly and carry a big stick", save money, be less of a consumer, live a healthy life style, and be more confident. My current education goals are to obtain a bachelors degree(s) in Global Poverty and Peace Development and Psychology with a minor in Fine Arts. I would also like to work towards both a Masters and Ph. D in related fields. As far as my career goals, I desire to do many things but wonder how obtainable they truly are. I would like to specialize in family and play therapy- with an emphasis on families who are in poverty ( both internationally and domestically).I am interested in working with persons who are incarcerated and their families. I also interested ridding poverty through global and domestic development programs. My particular interest in those programs are family systems, education, and public health.

Well, Mr. President. I'm am about ready to call it a night. I am working the midnight shift at my job and need a little nap. So your question today is " Aren't you tired of this cold weather?" I know it's cold there and it sure is cold here. Okay, I know, what a question but you just wait, I'll have a good one for you soon.

I wish you and your family love and peace.

Sincerely,

Mary Gauldin

Knots and Twitches

For awhile I have had this feeling and it's very uncomfortable.

I am anxious.

I worry.

I am slightly paranoid to say the least.

My stomach is in knots.

My eye wont stop twitching.

I am afraid of doing everything wrong.

I doubt myself a lot.

I am not as tall or as confident as I may come across.

I feel like I'm in limbo- and I am not good at that game- nor do I want to be a citizen there.

I care too much about this.

I care too little about that.

I feel as if I am on trial, facing numerous charges against others and especially myself.

I am a my accuser, my Judge, and my lawyer all in one.

One false move...

Execution... Off with her head!

I think I might be going crazy with all my worries.

My head is tired from my restless heart.

Jesus tells us not to worry about what we will eat, drink, or wear. He tells us not to store up treasures that moth and rust can destroy. But wait... what if I worry that I am not going to make it- that I wont make the cut- that I won't end global poverty in one fowl swoop- what if I never even finish school? What if never get to be a mother? What if always fail? What if I never fully recover?What if I never even get a chance?

I can sooth my soul with scripture about making united states poverty wages; I can sooth my soul about not being able to even afford curtains for my house; I can handle having gray hair at 25; I can handle lots of things.

But I can't handle this.

My worries are some of my hearts deepest desires.

And those are worth more than silver or gold.

Luke 12: 32-34

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.